Cappy Cross Consulting

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Cappy Cross Consulting specializes in personal & spiritual development, and team building coaching services that are tailored to your personal life, your business, your challenges, and your goals!

My personal goal is to help you discover the "you" inside of you, beyond the person you were scripted to be. Our work together will be grounded in real day to day issues to produce tangible, bottom line outcomes. We use the context of your current being to develop the being you CHOOSE to be, and provide the knowledge to gain freedom from old beliefs and ways of being in each moment! In the case of team building activities, it will focus on identifying and moving beyond the ego issues that prevent people from seeing through mostly trivial issues and being committed to generating both personal and team success in the business environment.
 
Areas of training / development include:
  • Spirituality / Spiritual awakening 
  • Personal Growth and Development 
  • Team Building - Enhancing interpersonal relationships 
  • Letting go of fears / insecurities / self image concerns 
  • Finding the fun in your life!
Find out more About Us, then look at our Services to make your possibilities a reality.


  

Ask the Expert! 
For free email advice, send your questions, comments or ideas to cappy@cappycross.com. For issues that are of particular interest to the community, we may publish (with your permission) your questions along with our answers on this web site.

Following is an ongoing blog - enjoy!  


Thursday, November 28, 2013 - THANKSGIVING!
After almost a year and a half with no updates to the blog, it is high time! Much has happened since my last update. Two moves, from Spring Hill back to the Gulf of Mexico in Hernando Beach in February 2013, then a move to Hudson in July 2013 with a large canal in the back yard leading to the Gulf of Mexico. A trip to Callifornia in January 2013 to spend time with family and friends. I added another job in August of 2013 as a part time slot machine service engineer at the Hard Rock Casino in Tampa, and the computer service business continues to expand slowly but surely. Continued spiritual studies and personal development work has brought an even higher level of joy in each moment, and an ever stronger commitment to keep sharing that with the world around me. All in all, much to be thankful for on this beautiful Thanksgiving day. May you and yours enjoy a peaceful day filled with the joy of being! Namaste'

Monday, June 4, 2012
Finally - the site has been moved to its new hosting home! For now there are few images, but that will come over the next several days. Also, thanks to suggestions from several viewers, the site has a new crisper, lighter look and feel and the size of the text is being expanded slightly to make it easier to read. Please - send any feedback or suggestions you have! In the almost two months since I have updated this, the web site and I have both moved to new homes.


Sunday, April 8, 2012

Easter Sunday wishes... 
Wishing all a beautiful day of remembrance and joy. The act of one was presented to show all that to live in eternity, we must be willing to die in the body. We say it is to sacrifice, but we are actually sacrificing nothing...more accurately, to stay in these bodies would be the sacrifice of our formless, ageless all knowing nature. Think rather of this time in a body as simply a learning adventure you chose to come to, with no intention of staying but a moment, before returning to your full nature! Be peace, share joy, express love...Namaste


Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Food for thought for today... 
If I am depressed, I am living in the past.
If I am anxious, I am living in the future.
If I am at peace, I am living in the present moment!
Which would you choose? Which DO you choose?


Friday, March 16, 2012
Friday's exercise in wellness... 
For today, let each of us try to forgive ourselves the judgements we make of the world and everything in it. May we realize that all of it is a made up illusion, passed down from person to person, and that we, each of us, has the power to change the illusion as co-creators of the universe. If there is an original sin, it is simply the mistaken belief that we could ever truly be separated from that which created us, and is eternally a part of us, and we part of it. Let us be aware that not only our words and actions shape this creation, but more importantly our thoughts about it, for it is thoughts that then move into words and actions. Awaken to the possibility that your way of being in the world has been based on acting out a script written for you by others, and that you have the power to release that script, and start writing your own new script from the knowledge in your heart and soul. You needn't believe it, but simply ask yourself "What if this is true?", and then start observing the world and your being in it from that possibility. When anything that comes at you causes any un-loving reaction, stop yourself for a moment and ask, is this reaction one I would choose, or might I be acting out a response I was taught by others who may have been mistaken in what they taught me? If you do this, you will start making different choices, and you will start seeing the world in a different light. That is changing creation, in this moment!
Be well...Namaste

Thursday, March 15, 2012
Clues to who you are...and openings to who you might choose to be 
In a previous blog I referred to the book "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz as a HUGE possibility to helping doscover the real you and the joy within. Today I will add another very simple but powerful exercise to help discover that same potential. I wish to thank a very cool program called The Forum, by Landmark Education for this discovery tool.
 
During our early years, let's say somewhere between age 3 to 14 for discussions sake, we made three critical discoveries that had a major impact on shaping who we becamse and how we reacted to life throughout our later years. Those three major points are: 
SOMETHING'S WRONG! That very first time you became aware of something being seriously wrong. Not something like "We're out of cereal" lol...this was a major something wrong moment. 
DIFFERENT THAN THE REST! The first time you became aware that you were uniquely different than anyone else. Someting occurred to you that made this fact very clear for the very first time. 
ON YOUR OWN! The first time it hit you that you were truly on your own in this life, I mean really on your own, something that occurred that awakened this knowledge within you.
Take some time to reflect on these three ideas and identify your specific things that brought these awarenesses to you. When you do you'll have discovered three major factors that helped define your behaviors and reactions to things you have experienced in your life, and how you respond to events in your world today. It will emppower you to release some of the fears and roadblocks certain situations present for you, and to experience new situations with a new freedom from fear and worry.

I would love to hear from anyone with their three items if any of you care to share, and what you think they have caused for you in your life after thos points. It is through honest and open sharing that we all learn and grow to experience a richer, more joy filled experience in our lives, so let it rip!
Be well...Namaste

Sunday, March 11, 2012
Sunday morning thoughts... 
I realized it's been a week since I've added anything...sometimes the time gets away from us! Happy Daylight Savings change - back to lighter evenings and darker mornings...
 
This morning's thoughts center on being present in the moment, versus being lost in the swirling boggle of thoughts that keep us from doing so. I find that a fair amount of those thoughts focus on looking "out there" for the things I think I need to be happy, whatever those things may be...new car, bigger/better house, new clothes, romantic interests, etc., etc., etc. Not bad things to think about at times, but it's important to recognize that when they consume our thoughts, they are also keeping us from experiencing whatever joy is present within us in this instant. They also reinforce the false notion that whatever we are or have now is "not enough"!
 
We are, each of us, the power and presence of Creation in this instant! You are the universe - it would not exist for you if not for your conscious awareness of it. It, and everything within it, is only present for you because of the thoughts of it in your mind! As co-creator in it, you choose how to see it, how to feel about it, and most importantly, who you are going to be in it! Choose wisely! Want more peace in your world? Be a more peaceful force in it! Wish there were more laughter in your life? Tell a few more jokes or funny stories and create that laughter. Wish for more love in your life? Feel and express more love for the world around you, and I promise you it will start coming back to you. What we genuinely put out there, is what is out there to come back to us. Worry less about what or who someone else is being and putting out there - you have no power in controlling that. You have absolute power only in who you choose to be in it all! 
Wishing you a spectacularly beautifiul day!!!

Saturday, March 3, 2012

The Invitation - from Oriah Mountain Dreamer, Indian Elder 
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking a fool for love, for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstacy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.
It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul, if you can be faithless and therefore be trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver moon, "Yes!"
It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn't interest me who you know, or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Choice - a tough issue in finding our joy and happiness in life! 
So many times I hear both friends and clients express pain or unhappiness because of what they "have" to do, or because they do not feel happy or peaceful in their life, or, very often the case, in their relationship with another. 

Let's first address the "have to do" portion...

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE! I am deadly serious about this. Over and over I hear people (myself included in the past) say "I HAVE to get up and go to work tomorrow" or "I have to do this or that". EVERYTHING you do in your life is YOUR choice!!! Every thought you keep in your mind, every word that comes out of your mouth, and most importantly, every action you take, is ENTIRELY  YOUR CHOICE! If you can come to know the truth of this statement, you will start opening doors to true happiness and peace in your life. You have been scripted since birth how to walk, when to walk, when to talk, how to talk, and how to react to the things that "come at you" in your life. This scripting came from all over the place - your Mom, Dad, sister,brother, aunt, uncle, friends, priest-rabbi-minister, teachers...all at time when you were too young to understand that you unconsciously made agreements to be and say and do these things! Maybe you were taught that if someone cusses you out or treats you disrespectfully, you must respond in kind, or even punch them out. If you choose to follow that teaching, you are not acting out of your own knowledge or heart, you are blindly following a "script" handed you by another. There is another way, you have another CHOICE! Following our scripts is a major reason why the world is in the shape it is today. Our soul does not yearn for greed, mean spirited actions, or violence towards another. If you can awaken to this truth, and take an instant when something "comes at you" in life (even if it is a thought that enters your mind rather than an occurrence from without) to say wait a second, my automatic reaction feels like such and such, but what will be my CHOICE in this moment???, then you start to encounter the REAL you within, rather than the scripted you of your consciousness. Without exception, everyone I have coached in this who has made the effort has reported beautiful life changes in their life...I repeat - without exception! Is your life too busy, overscheduled, no time to be with yourself and reflect or just enjoy the moment? You CHOSE this, and you can change your choice! Do you spend too much money that you don't have, attaining material things someone outside yourself has convinced you that you need to be happy? You CHOOSE this, and you can change that choice! You honestly do not even have to get out of bed in the morning. Of course I am not advocating that you should choose to do this, but if you will see the truth of it, that you will choose to get out of bed, then maybe you can also see that you will choose what kind of day you will have, you will choose what kind of thoughts you allow to stay in your mind, and you will choose what words you speak and how you behave towards your brothers and sisters on this planet, and not allow yourself to be ruled by what choices others might make. Just a thought...

As to our relationships with another...

In my own relationships and many others I observe, I see a classic pattern repeated. Again, this deals with choices. In the beginning of a romantic relationship, there is often included an infatuation component - we could not LIVE without this other person. We could never be HAPPY without this other person. Often, though not always, this will include strong physical attraction and sexual aspects. It is all very romantic and close and loving. And we do not consciously realize or accept that we have chosen these aspects - they seem to have arisen somewhere outside of our minds. For some time, perhaps, weeks, or months, or even years, things are amazingly energetic and passionate and fulfilling. Then, one day, one or the other partner realizes something has faded, or failed entirely, and they no longer feel that passion, excitement, and sense of lovingness towards their partner or friend. This is a classic example of the ego seeking to assert itself, combined with a lack of awareness of the role choice played in the beginning of the relationship. To maintain the commitment towards feelings and passion towards another is a CHOICE. Constantly needing new stimulation, the ego becomes easily bored and wants to chase after something new, a new challenge, new conquest, new acquisition. It does not even understand itself, much less you and what your soul really seeks. So off it will have you go, chasing once again those feelings of new-ness, exhilaration, excitement, totally overriding the quieter desires of your soul, which simply seeks the constant amazement at even being in the first place! When we see one of those seemingly rare couples who, after 30, 40, 50 even 60 years together, still have eyes that obviously shine for each other, still speak to each other in terms of endearment and respect, and still cherish each other over anyone or anything else, this is not an accident, or a freak of nature! They have recognized, and CHOSEN to stay awake to the beauty of each other's soul and presence. They have remained aware that all the other fluff that comes at us in life is just that, fluff, and not of consequence in the bigger scheme of things. Does this mean that ALL couples can remain together in this manner? Admittedly not...when there is a great difference in soul awareness, the younger or less experienced soul is going to be too ego driven to operate in this kind of spiritually fulfilled relationship, and in that case, it is better that the couple part ways and allow each to seek a more appropriate match to their level of development. Just as it would not be appropriate to have 1st graders in school classes with 10th graders since they are at such different places in their knowledge and understanding, the same is true of adult relationships. So, I close with wishing you the reader might find that close enough match where both of you commit and remain so to share a long and joyous time together, if that is your path in this part of your journey! Namaste

Sunday, February 26, 2012
Pain Blankets - one of our biggest challenges 
Over the past few months, I have had a chance to witness the power of our attachment to our "Pain Blankets" - pain we wrap ourselves in and choose to hold onto in spite of having any number of reasons to let go of it. As beings who operate "in order to", most of us make our choices "in order to" gain or receive something we believe we value. Why, one might ask, would I ever choose to hang onto pain? Consciously we wouldn't, but it is the unconscious where this operates. In the case of pain, a couple of key reasons might include having been taught that when we are in pain, others will want to comfort, or pity, or love us to try to help us out of our pain. Another might be our mis-belief that we are sinful, and thus deserve to be in pain as a punishment.
 
My witness to this insanity over the past few months has been working with a being who was in a terribly painful marriage, subjected to emotional and physical abuse, eventually broke free of that relationship, and in the process was hit with a myriad of outcomes to be dealt with. These included financial and credit issues, loss of property, legal challenges, arrest, loss of employment, risk to professional license, dealing with multiple lawyers, and worst of all, being abandoned by the children in the family.
 
Over a three month period, step by step, most of those challenges have been addressed and resolved. And yet, while one would hope to see a lightening of spirit as each challenge is met and successfully resolved, the opposite has been the case. As each seeming problem drops away this person has picked a new focus to see pain and unhappiness in. The biggest remaining fear - never having a relationship with the children, still holding the most fear and pain.
 
The crowning moment came yesterday...after almost 6 months without contact with the children, a three hour drive and unannounced visit was made, resulting in a re-starting of the relationship and the possibility of rebuilding the family. One might hope that this amazing outcome would result in true joy and, finally, some feeling of peace returning. What I witnessed instead was, if anything, a deepening of depression, an almost sleepless night, and anything but expressions of joy and hope.
 
Does this sound like insanity??? Is there a better witness to the craziness of the mis-teachings most of us have been given throughout our lives??? I realized that through this whole process what I have been allowed to observe is the insanity of our thinking that happiness, peace and true joy can come from anything outside of ourselves. It is indeed not "out there" to be found, but resides deep within ourselves! It can be found only through searching within, identifying, and being willing to release a belief system we choose to hold ourselves prisoner within, that was given us by others, trapped in the same system, who handed it down without realizing it.
 
How, you might ask, do we accomplish this? It is simple, but please do not confuse "simple" with "easy", for they are not at all the same. The first thing required is a genuine desire for change! Without that, no openings will likely occur. When we get tired enough of the seeming pain and misery of what we perceive as being "all around us", and genuinely desire something different, that is the moment for an opening to occur.
 
One simple path I have found to start with is reading a very tiny, but immensely powerful book - "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz. At only 138 pages and beautifully written, it is a very easy read. I recommend reading it slowly and thoughtfully, and then start observing the world around you from the possibility of the concepts and ideas it offers. You don't even need to believe it - simply say to yourself "What if this is true? What if it could be this simple to undo the insanity we find ourselves in?" You may very well find your self laughing at the craziness we create out of what is, in the end, a simple misunderstanding, and nothing more...
Go in peace, share love, live joyfully my friends!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Thoughts on perception... 
Perception...Wikipedia defines it as "Perception (from the Latin perceptio, percipio) is the process of attaining awareness or understanding of the environment by organizing and interpreting sensory information. All perception involves signals in the nervous system, which in turn result from physical stimulation of the sense organs. For example, vision involves light striking the retinas of the eyes, smell is mediated by odor molecules and hearing involves pressure waves. Perception is not the passive receipt of these signals, but can be shaped by learning, memory and expectation. Perception involves these "top-down" effects as well as the "bottom-up" process of processing sensory input. Perception depends on complex functions of the nervous system, but subjectively seems mostly effortless because this processing happens outside conscious awareness."
 
Conscious awareness...so lacking so often, that we are not aware IN THE MOMENT, when we most need to be, that WE shape our perception, and can change it! A simple but beautiful example - yesterday, a person I dearly love clipped a mailbox and snapped off the side mirror of their car. Their perception was that they had added yet another burden to my life in the form of something else I needed to repair for them. My perception is that this provided simply one more way for me to show my love and caring for them by taking care of it. Years ago, I too might have seen it as yet one more thing I had to give up my precious time to. That was before I awakened to the power of choice, MY CHOICE, in how I perceive the world around me, and who I choose to be in that world. Be the light you were created in, and as...it is, at the core, who you are! Namaste

Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Sharing a thought from Deepak Chopra... 
Deepak Chopra, in his book "The Book of Secrets", states so beautifully what I know to be true that I shall use his own words...[Secret #7 *Every Life Is Spiritual*]
UNIVERSAL: Consciousness creates by design.
PERSONAL: Nothing is random -- your life is full of signs and symbols.
The war between religion and science is old and nearly exhausted, but on one point, neither side is willing to budge. Religion sees design in nature as proof of a creator. Science sees randomness in nature as proof of no design at all. Yet there has never been a culture based upon chaos, including the subculture of science. Consciousness looks at the universe and sees design everywhere, even if the spaces in between looked disorganized and random. For the individual, it's impossible not to see order -- every aspect of life from the family outward is based on it. Your brain is set up to perceive patterns (even an inkblot looks like some kind of image, no matter how hard you try not to see one) because it took patterns of cells to make a brain. The mind is ultimately a machine for making meaning, even when it flirts with meaninglessness, as the twentieth and twenty-first centuries have done so well.


 
Guided by: The Power and Presence of the Creation!




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